Monday, April 17, 2006

Pesach blues

The 1 minute seder (hebrew)

http://haggadah.z-kit.com/h.swf


Kosher for passover beer!

http://www.jewishworldreview.com/kosher/passover_beer.php3


Who let the jews out?

http://passovergreeting.com/


How to break Matzah exactly in half! (Japanese, What!)

http://youtube.com/watch?v=Jj_HzQSWKBQ

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Found in mail, figured worthy of sharing.

A priest, a Pentecostal preacher and a rabbi at Northern Michigan University in Marquette would get together two or three times a week for coffee and to talk Shop. One day, someone made the comment that preaching to people isn't really all that hard. A real challenge would be to preach to a bear.

One thing led to another and they decided to do an experiment. They would all go out into the woods, find a bear, preach to it, and attempt to convert it. Seven days later, they all convened to discuss the experience.

Father Flannery, who had his arm in a sling, was on crutches, and had various bandages, went first. "Well," he said, "I went into the woods to find me a bear. And when I found him I began to read to him from the Catechism. Well, that bear wanted nothing to do with me and began to slap me around. So I quickly grabbed my holy water, sprinkled him and, Holy Mary, Mother of God, he became as gentle as a lamb. The bishop is coming out next week to give him first communion and confirmation.

Reverend Billy Bob spoke next. He was in a wheelchair, with one arm and both legs in casts, and an IV drip. In his best fire and brimstone oratory he claimed, "WELL, brothers, you KNOW that we don't sprinkle! I went out and I FOUND me a bear. And then I began to read to my bear from God's HOLY WORD! But that bear wanted nothing to do with me. So I took HOLD of him and we began to wrestle. We wrestled down one hill, UP another and DOWN another until we came to a creek. So I quick DUNKED him and BAPTIZED his hairy soul. And, just like you said, he became as gentle as a lamb. We spent the rest of the day praising J.

They both looked down at the rabbi, who was lying in a hospital bed. He was in a body cast and traction with IV's and monitors running in and out of him. He was in bad shape. The rabbi looked up and said, "Looking back at it, circumcision may not have been the best way to start things out with my bear.

2 Comments:

At 12:46 PM, Blogger Faye Spalter said...

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-1854463868522171853&q=pesach+cleaning&pl=true

check this one out. I'm surprised you didn't have it!

 
At 12:53 PM, Blogger Chasidishe Shaigitz said...

LOL! I must have missed that one, truly hillarious :)

Thanks for sharing.

 

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