Last night I went to a 24-hour grocery. When I got there, the guy was locking the front door. I said, "Hey, the sign says you're open 24 hours." He goes: "Not in a row!"
So busy these days, but I've got my priorities straight and therefore I always try not to let my daily life interfere with my blogging ;) Was thinking that in a CS kind of world I would eliminate either one of the days from the week or one of the months of the year just so that I can add more hours to a day, and that way we can divide the day into daytime, nighttime, and chilling "do whatever the heck you want" time!
Think about it, having a official time each day where doing nothing is what you are meant to be doing, just sit back and relax. Hey I can dream if I want too ;)
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A man goes into a drug store and asks the pharmacist if he can give
him something for the hiccups.
The pharmacist promptly reaches out and slaps the man's face.
"What the heck did you do that for!?!" the man screams.
"Well, you don't have the hiccups anymore do you?"
The man says, "No I don't, you IDIOT... But my wife out in the car
still does!"
Just so you all know, whoever made up the solution of scaring someone to get rid of their hiccups is full of crap, I should know, I tried it on my sister last night!
Was sitting with the family in the kitchen last night and my sis had a serious case of the hiccups, so me being the great bro that I am, snuck up behind her, grabbed her arms and yelled Boo!!! I scared her good and it worked... for like 10 seconds, then she got over the shock and started hiccuping again but not only that, now she was a hiccuping girl who wanted to strangle her dear brother :( Good thing she's got a sense of humor, and I managed to get her to smile again, from 30 feet away.
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The First 3 Years of Marriage
In the first year of marriage, the man speaks and the woman listens.
In the second year, the woman speaks and the man listens.
In the third year, they both speak and the neighbors listen.
Should guys go out of their way on a date to open the (car) door for the girl? what do you guys think, play the shidduch game and on with the show or is it really cheesy and its better to just act natural...?
posted by Chasidishe Shaigitz @ 3:12 PM
40 comments
40 Comments:
howd u scare her?
shidduch game is funny, if u ask me. but i would prob freak out if a guy went out of his was to open the for for me-thats just weird.
ya i dont like it when the guy goes out of his way to open. when you walk TO the car together he should open the door.. the rest of the time she can open it herself..
not that she cant open it any other time.. but its nice to give him a chance to play gentleman at least part of the time :)
"Should guys go out of their way on a date to open the (car) door for the girl?" It depends on where you are in the “chasidishe // shaigitz” realm and If you are a “gentleman” then also where you’re prospective kallah is holding that includes walking to the car the first time (when you pick her up) (this is usually a tznius issue at least regarding the car door)
Either way the woman will find something to fault about it. You know you never win with women anyway lol.
okay - lets hear what did you do , and how did she respond....;) ;)
Interesting...
Yachna this has nothing to do with a personal experience, just
something I've been wondering, and have spoken about with
other guys, getting different responses from them.
I'm sure you all understand what I mean by going out out of your way, of course one should be a gentleman, respectful and all, but sometimes its just obvious that you are overdoing it.
Most guys say that its totally unnecessary and its like putting up
a show, so don't bother and just act natural.
Being a gentleman and opening doors etc. the right thing to do, but to go out of your way (like getting out of the car when you pick her up just to open the
door for her) is pointless.
On the other hand there was another guy who went out of his way to be as gentleman like as possible, and (although it didn't work out between them) the girl mentioned to him that it was really nice of him to treat her that way and she appreciated it.
"this is usually a tznius issue at least regarding the car door"
I heard something about that, can anyone fill me in please.
(By calling it a dating game I don't mean its a joke, just that its kinda amusing how there are many rules to it, what do to and what not to do,(how to behave and dress, what to talk about, and of course the "break all the rules" rule.)
I think it is a joke-its even funny for some. just not personally appreciated.
"Most guys say that its totally unnecessary and its like putting up
a show, so don't bother and just act natural. "
do they go go on their dates not showered, in old sweats, dirty socks, messy hair, and burp at the table.. you know.. just acting natural..?
I think that opening the door for your date, and future wife iy"h, should be natural.
Why does everyone see it as an unnatural act? Just because it's something that, is not familiar to most frum couples- does not mean that it is wrong, or strange. My sister has been married for over a year now, and her Chosson always goes out of his way to open the car door for her.
The more you "act" respectively, to your date/wife, the more successful your marriage will be. So even if it just seems like a small, silly act- I really think it's important for the long run.
And for the girl you are dating, to whom it may feel strange- she should start getting used to and expecting such treatment. A woman is regal. Treat her regally. Really.
Of course all of this should go both ways, both partners should get treated royally, but I am talking from a girls point of view.
there's respectful, and then there's borderline awkward.
i had a really hard time getting used to it. when we walked to the car, i loved it. we walked together and he escorted me to the door, he opened it, waited till i got myself together, and then shut the door.
but on the way home, he got out of the car to open the door for me. that was beyond cheesy. but, i figured he wants to do it and wants to please me so i'll let him. but it was really annoying.
do the guys really want to open the door for their ladies of honor? if they don't, then yes, they are just putting on a show. if they indeed worship their women, and would lick the ground she walks on, then go ahead.
i've been out with plenty of guys and know when their into me or when they just want to get home to chill with the guys.
more importantly, MAKE CONVERSATION. but ask her what she likes and stuff, don't talk only about yourself. if she's shy, which she'll prob. be on the first few dates, probe with questions to make her feel comfortable.
and get her some food. u go out for hours and usually are starving towards the second half of the date. drinks do not fillyou up, and alchohol makes you hungry. offer to go to eat something, if she says no, which all my friends say, then just get some snacks or something.
now, the number one question: wehre do you date in the winter, when you can't just stroll the streets?
plus, pick her up from the house, or somewher ein yehupitz?
good luck cs. its hell.
http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=3558048916514295437&q=9870874078
There were many good points made. The reality is if it's just a show, it won't last and the bonus points you were trying to get won't add up in the end.
A date I was on the guy opened the car door for me, after which I made fun of him for it, but I did like it. The point - all girls are different, some like it, some don't, and some secretly like it like me (I guess it's not a secret anymore).
definitly open doors WHEN ur in an easy available situation. I think it reflects s/t about the guy whether hes a mentsch or kind..besides it makes u feel like a lady, not just another dude bochur hes hangin out with.
of course anything overboard CAN be cheesy.
I think it's nice when guys open doors for me - not just car doors but any doors. However, only when they are at the door first or in the case of a car they are going to go past the passenger door anyway. I was once with this guy at work who ran in front of me everytime we approached a door to open it for me. It really annoyed me.I mean I am able to open a door on my own.. When they aren't going overboard though I do like it. That may be because I am British though..The whole gentleman thing..
just wanted to say -your posts contain the best, corniest jokes - totally love em!
:-)!!!!!!
Wow, thanks all for the great info and advice, I'm have to look over all the comments again after shabbos and take down notes ;) really helpful.
Anon with the video clip, thanks for sharing, had me cracking up.
Sorry I cant reply in full to all the comments, I had long night working working at the JCM, I need to catch some sleep before shabbos otherwise I'll be a total zombie.
Gut shabbos to you all.
Brainstorm!!!
Was in middle of cleaning up from last night, scrubbing all the paint and glue off of my hand and face and even my hair, when it came to me, the perfect solution!
No need for me to worry about opening any doors, do or dont, you see first of all before I take a girl anywhere I’m going to make sure to check out the place and make sure the place has got automatic doors.. Brilliant no? But wait it gets better, was thinking about what in the world I would do about the opening the car door. Horse and buggy is pushing it and I’m not sure what my chances are of convincing any girl to go biking on a date so after giving it some thought I figured out the solution, listen up people, any girl that goes out with me is going to have the ride of her life… On the subway! Look ma, no hands :p
Ok so maybe I am a bit tired…
Shabbat Shalom.
HEHE love it....subway....does she get to sit next to a real sheigetz?
While on the topic of appropriate dating behavior - what's your take on the guy waiting for the girl to get inside her house at the end of the evening? I don't think it's unnatural or fake to make sure a girl is safely inside at 1 am.
A Jewish man is speeding along the highway at 1 a.m. A policeman stops him and asks, "Where are you racing at this hour?
"To a lecture," the man responds.
"Who will give you a lecture at this hour?" the policeman wonders.
"My wife," he replies
thought of you when saw this:
New policy in admittance to heaven, you had to have a really bad day the day you died.
first guy tells angel at gate his story. " for some time i suspected my wife of having an affair.so today i was goning to come home to catch them. i bust into our apt. on the 25th floor.ready to catch them , there is my wife half naked,and im running around the apt.searching for this guy.But i couldnt find him!! jsut as i was about to give up, i happend to see out the balcony and there was a man hanging off the edge by his fingertips!! the nerve of that guy to think he could hide from me!! well, i ran out ther and stomped on his fingers til he fell to the ground, But wouldnt you know it, he landed in some bushes that broke his fall and he didnt die.
In a rage, i went back inside to get the first thing i could get my hands on to throw at him.Oddly enough, the 1st thing i could grab was the refrigeator. unplugged itand pushed it out, it plummeted 25 stories and crushed him!! the excitement gave me a heart attack and i died."
ya that was a bad day -angel said.
few seconds later next guy comes up to heaven
angel: to enter tell me about you bad day ..
" okay ... i was out on the balcony of my 26th floor apartment doing my daily exercisies when i got a little carried away and accidentally fell over the side!Luckily howerver, i was able to catchmyself by my fingertios on the balcony directly beneath mine. Then all of a sudden this crazy man comes running out and starts cursing and stomping on my fingers!! I fell, but hit some bushes which broke my fall, so i didnt die. an im lying the face up on the ground , unable to move from pain, i see the man push his refrigerator,of all things, over the ledge and it falls directly on top of me and kills me!!
the angel is quietly laughing to himself.
A few seconds later a third man in line comes up to the gate.
"Tell me about the day you died." says the angel.
"OK.Picture this" says the man. "I'm naked inside a refrigerator.... "
:) :) :) :)
Dude, I can't believe you asked that question about holding the door open. Talk about opening a can of worms...
In my opinion, anything that isn't natural is cheesy, and anything that is natural and sincere is sweet and right, even if seemingly cheesy as hell, and is the right thing to do. Which means that a guy who holds the door for a girl because he read on this blog (or anywhere else, for that matter) that that's the right thing to do is acting cheesy and dumb. Ma shein kein, a guy who is acting sincerely, when the girl feels that sincerety, shouldn't worry about how he will look making any gestures. I mean, for G-d's sake, any romantic gesture, sans the romance, is cheesy.
Being self-concious and worrying too much is what kills a good time by a) overdoing the moment because of ceremony, or b) feeling self concsious and not letting go and being yourself and instead being cold and unresponsive. So try to rid yourself of any notions of what you are meant to do (besides for halacha and propriety, which must always be in your mind, of course), forget any advice you were told or read, and just be the person you'll be if the dating works; i.e., yourself, and not some fake representation of yourself.
gut gezokt dovid!
it really doesn't work, a glass of water and some patience will usualy do the trick.
On a date once I saw the girl standing in front of the door, i asked is something wrong with it?
If women want to vote they should bera the consequences:)
i'm going to have to disagree a little but with dovid.. not everything that should be done will come naturally.. sometimes you need to bend what's natural to you to accomodate what she is naturally expecting or needs. soemtimes you have to do what will make her feel good, even if it doesnt come natural, thats the whole point of being in a relatioship, learning, and changing, and growing.
but.. i do agree that it looks cheesy when seen from the outside, without the sincerity - its worthless.
i think the litmus test should be - are you doing this to please her, or are you doing this to impress her. impressing is wrong, no one wants to be impressed, its fake. but pleasing her, making her happy, taking caer of her, making her feel special.. now thats sincere and real..and yummy!
Just to clarify: I am not talking about the thigs she actually wants/needs. That stuff you have to supply regardless of if you feel it or not. I'm talking about the symbolic gestures, which are meant to show on you. That stuff looks dumb and awkward when done insincerely.
So CS, howd u scare her????
ya time to change icon, chya
DOVID ith you on this one, as I think that for a guy who is acting sincerely then good for him (and especially good for her,) cuz those "gestures" as you put it, are natural for him and are in no way out of ordinary so its not like he is going out of his way, on the other hand it its insincere and he's just trying to impress then as ANONYM00KIE wrote, its worthless!
CHAYA: I already wrote that this has nothing to do with a personal experience of mine, well not entirely at least, someone was trying to set me up recently, and I got into this conversation with my mom and sis, and basically my mom said if I don't open the door for a girl she will kick my tush.
LOL Love the new icon chaya :p
How'd u scare ur sis with the hiccups?????
true it looks dumb and akward when gestures r unnatural and insincere HOWEVER there is an element of trying to please that IS necessary.
u cant rely solely on the idea that this is who i am-finished.
bochurim need to learn basic skills on how to treat woman.
i for one,never thought i cared about all this gentlemans crap, until i dated this guy who made me realize that it did matter...i wont go into to detail,but basically have weather gear,show up in a mentschlich car,say thank yous and yes maybe even open some doors.
and take the goddamn hanger off the car!!!
also, no vans..
if you don't have a nice car- rent one.
i say keep the hanger, and the van.. and just be a mentch
hey , cs , did you perform for the tzeiri hashluchim?
Hey what about station wagons ;)
ANON Nope I'm not acting in this one (although they did offer me a part) I would have loved to, but I've got to many other stuff to deal with these days.
Still it was fun building for them and I offered to fill in if needed for any of the regular actors.
like what you doin ,lookin for more yokes for the oilom? and please no reruns...;)
u call the cave fun!!!!!!!! i'll admit there were some funny moments there but calling it fun????
LOL wires, now that you mention it... ;)
I killed 3 good pairs off pants :(
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