If women ruled the world... Funny or Scary :p

Everybody on earth dies and goes to heaven. G-d comes and says, "I want the men to make two lines. One line for the men that dominated their women on earth, and the other line for the men that were dominated by their women."

With that said and done, the next time G-d looked, the women are gone and there are two lines. The line of the men that were dominated by their women was 100 miles long, and in the line of men that dominated their women, there was only one man.

G-d got mad and said, "You men should be ashamed of yourselves. I created you in my image and you were all whipped by your mates. Look at the only one of my sons that stood up and made me proud. Learn from him! Tell them my son, how did you manage to be the only one in this line?"

And the man replied, "I don't know, my wife told me to stand here."


If women actually did rule the world.
1. Shopping would be considered an aerobic activity.
2. Men would not be allowed to eat gas-producing foods within two hours of bedtime.
3. All toilet seats would be nailed down.
4. Men would pay as much attention to their woman as to their car.
5. For basic training, soldiers would have to take care of a two-year old for six weeks.



6. All men would be forced to spend one month in a PMS (Psychotic Mood Shift) simulator.
7. Singles bars would have metal detectors to weed out men hiding wedding rings in their pocket.
8. TV news segments on sports would never run longer than 1 minute.
9. A man would no longer be considered a "good catch" simply because he is breathing.
10. Fewer women would be dieting because their ideal weight standard would increase by 30 pounds.



11. Men would bring drinks, chips and dip to women watching soap operas.
12. Men would learn phrases like: "I'm sorry" "I love you" "You're beautiful" and "Of course you don't look fat in that outfit"
13. Men would be judged entirely by their looks, women by their accomplishments.
14. Men would sit around and wonder what WOMEN are thinking.
15. Overweight men would have their weight brought to their attention constantly.



After a baby is born, men would take a six-week paternity leave to wait on their wives hand and foot.

Chocolate & doughnuts would have no calories.



Parallel parking would become obsolete.

There would be a special unit at the hospital emergency room for broken fingernails.

A bad hair day would be a legitimate reason to take off work.

All scales would be programmed to automatically deduct 15 pounds when a female checks her weight and add 20 pounds when a man checks his.



Instead of “playing games” and saving lives, all superheroes would be doing more important things, like staying home doing the dishes and cleaning the house.

“Sure he might wear the pants in the family, but SHE picks the size and color” ;)



It's all in the punctuation:

An English professor wrote the words,
"Woman without her man is nothing" on the blackboard and directed his
students to punctuate it correctly.
The men wrote: "Woman, without her man, is nothing."
The women wrote: "Woman: Without her, man is nothing."


Click HERE for some cool Worth1000 "if women ruled the world" photo galleries, enjoy.