Oh whatever, lets just say that old'ish feeling is kicking in again, might have something to do with all my friends getting engaged... (Which brings to mind one of my favorite jokes: Old aunts used to come up to me at weddings, poking me in the ribs and cackling, telling me, "You're next." They stopped after I started doing the same thing to them at funerals.)

A big lol to my cousin who handled it all so well at his sisters L'chaim, whenever someone came over to him to wish him a l'chaim he would raise his cup and say "ok mister let me just go ahead and paraphrase your l'chaim/blessing for you, "Imy'h by me" and thank you very much ;)

Anyhow this site is almost guaranteed to make ALMOST anyone feel young again (in a humorous way of course ;) here are some of my favorites. Enjoy.



"These days, I spend a lot of time thinking about the hereafter. I go somewhere to get something... then wonder what I'm here after."

"Funny, I don't remember being absent minded..."

"My mind not only wanders. Sometimes it leaves completely."


"I've seen it all, done it all, heard it all. I just can't remember it all!"

Too old to care... Too senile to remember.

There are three signs of old age.
The first is your loss of memory. I forget the other two.



My teeth are my own. I have the receipt.

"It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness you like."

"I'm smiling all the time. Because I can't hear a word you are saying."


Forget health foods. I need all the preservatives I can get!


Being "over the hill" is much better than being under it!

Old age comes at a bad time.

Retired. Now I can do what I want. As long as it's near a bathroom.


I loved this story...
The Tooth Fairy: While working for an organization that delivers lunches to elderly shut-ins, I used to take my 4-year-old daughter on my afternoon rounds. The various appliances of old age, particularly the canes, walkers and wheelchairs, unfailingly intrigued her. One day I found her staring at a pair of false teeth soaking in a glass. As I braced myself for the inevitable barrage of questions, she merely turned and whispered, "The tooth fairy will never believe this!"


And of course

Seniors singles ads

Long-Term Commitment: Recent widow who has just buried fourth husband looking for someone to round out a six-unit plot. Dizziness, fainting, shortness of breath not a problem.

Serenity Now: I am into solitude, long walks, sunrises, the ocean, Yoga and meditation. If you are the silent type, let's get together, take our hearing aids out and enjoy quiet times.

Winning Smile: Active grandmother with original teeth seeking a dedicated flosser to share rare steaks, corn on the cob and caramel candy.

Mint Condition: Male, 1922, high mileage, good condition, some hair, many new parts including hip, knee, cornea, valves. Isn't in running condition, but walks well.

Memories: I can usually remember Monday through Thursday. If you can remember Friday, Saturday and Sunday, let's put our two heads together