Official CS Bochur Dating Resume

15 Quick dating Q's for guys

GENERAL INFO.

Name: (Example) Chasidishe Shagitz Nick Name: Shaigitz’le
Sex: Deprived D.O.B.: 3/2/83

1. Reason for wanting to get married.
a) Parents kicking me out of the house
b) Feeling old and lonely
c) All my friends are married
d) Moms cooking sucks.
e) I wish I knew
f) I’ve reached that age you know

2. How many kids do you want to have?
a) Kids!?!?!?!?
b) 1 Boy, 1 Girl, Cat & a Dog
c) 7
d) Enough to have our own Minyan
e) 15+ No such thing as too many!

3. Expect to live in a…
a) Apartment
b) House
c) Doghouse
d) public park
e) Parents home is cool

4. Career.
a) Rabbi/Shliach
b) Scammer
c) Garbage truck driver
d) Respected beggar
e) Planning on winning the lottery
f) G-d will provide AKA father-in-law


HEALTH ISSUES

5. Would you consider yourself normal/sane?
a) 100.10% Normal
b) Normal is boring!
c) As long as I remember the take my meds
d) Compared to whom?

6. Do you smoke?
a) Quit at age 13
b) Never
c) Casual smoker
d) Addicted smoker
e) Pot, but strictly for Medicinal purposes!

7. Do you drink?
a) Waiting till I’m 41
b) only at Shalom Zachors and L’chaims
c) Occasional drinker
d) Every day is an occasion!

HYGIENE

8. Shower
a) Daily
b) Twice a day
c) Once a week
d) When I start attracting flies
e) Mikvah every morning

9. Deodorant
a) Every day
b) 3 times a day, I sweat a lot
c) Only if I smell
d) When people begin avoiding me
e) Cologne works fine


PERSONAL

10. Would you consider yourself good looking?
a) Brad pitt look-alike
b) My mom says I’m good looking
c) What’s wrong with pimples
d) Quasimodo look-alike
e) Mirrors shatter at the sight of me
f) Never judge a book by its cover!

11. Beard
a) Full beard
b) I roll it up
c) I trim, but you would never know
d) Professional picker
e) Clean shaven tushy face
f) Never grew!

12. Clothing
a) Strictly latest fashions
b) Only wear brand name clothing
c) Wal-mart and payless
d) Older brothers hand me downs

13. Neatness
a) Neat freak
b) Semi slob
c) Still searching for the bedroom floor
d) Need to call sanitation department and exterminators to clean my room

14. Education
a) Pre-school
b) High school or GED
c) Street smart is better than book smart
d) I know my ABC’s
e) 2 + 2 = 5
f) Survived the entire system
g) Smicha is a masters

15. Religious status
a) Religious & Chasidish
b) Chasidish but not religious
c) Religious
d) Frei
e) Chasidishe Shaigitz